You Haven't lifted in a while when....

Bert Sorin

1. Your lifting belt is stiff.
2. your knee sleeves do not even stink any more.
3. You can only find one lifting shoe, the other one might be at home. maybe. 4. your knees hurt less.
5. your back hurts more.
6. the black marks on your thumbs from hook grip have faded.
7. your shins have healed.
8. no "stone callus" on your neck or forearms any more.
9. you open your gym bag to find a competition t shirt, with number still pinned on it.
10. your shaker bottle has moss-like mold in it.
11. 90% of your gym bag contents have petrified tacky nuggets on them.
12. you can't remember what the last strength cycle you did consisted of.
13. your mind tells you that 500lb. squat is no big deal.
14. your body tells you different.
15. Functional movement drills, stick, foam rolling are no longer a part of the warm up, they are day 1, 2, 3 respectively of your first week's programming.
16. Olympic lifting DRILLS sound like a good idea for the first time in a decade.
17. your first workout is done in a golf shirt and cargo pants, because you forgot to pack your shorts and t shirt.
18. your dried, clumped up, everyday pre-workout drink now makes you go into a rage, and rock back and forth until 2:30am.
19. percentages of your max do not even apply any more.
20. bands and chains seem somewhat novel again.
21. you don't have new muscle tears.
22. you do have new workout partners.
23. your wife actually WANTS you to get back in the gym.
24. you must wear a mask in the gym until you are once again respected enough to show your face.
25. about half way through the first day, you remember why you loved, and will always love, the "Strenuous Life".